The Great Reset - Part Two
We are in difficult times here in the United States and around the globe. As some areas of the United States are slowly reopening to restart the economy, other areas are going for a longer lockdown all due to COVID-19. If you had asked me at the beginning of 2020 what I felt the year will hold, I would have told you promise, progress, goals being met and prosperity. Two months in (at least for me partly due to the tornado in Nashville) I sit here and wonder what is the world going to look like.
In these two months, in fact, most likely another month to a month and a half for me, we have sat at home; binge watched countless hours of Netflix, Hulu, and Disney+; listened to music; played with our pets; talked via Zoom, FaceTime, and Skype; started plans for a better future; and some may have created the next best idea. Regardless of where you have found yourself in the spectrum of the day to day of quarantine, realize this, that no matter what you have done or what you haven’t done you are surviving and will be okay. You see we are all dealing with this situation differently and can have high’s and low’s. None of us know what tomorrow holds and we have to live for today.
When all of this started, a lot of us felt shellshocked and bewildered about what was happening. The tangible feeling of fear, hopelessness, and uncertainty, permeated the air. You could feel it and even now going into an essential business you can feel it. Many have been furloughed, laid off, shutdown their dream business, lost everything, concerned about paying their bills, putting food on the table, and so much more. Businesses are re-evaluating their structure, profitability, safety for their employees, expenditures, and so much more. We are all in a constant battle of when will this end and pure raw emotions of loneliness, fatigue, depression, anxiety, and so much more. This is the world we live in right now; however, it is not the world we will live in the future. Though I have personally fought a lot of these battles, I do know that there is hope for a better tomorrow. It may be different than what we were looking at before the lockdowns; however, it will be bright. We all have to make conscious decisions to move forward.
In the business worlds, bosses are being exposed and true leaders are coming to the forefront. The hard decisions of trying to have the business be viable for when the doors open up and the economy comes roaring back. Many businesses have seen a decrease in revenue or a complete halt of revenue. These are trying times affecting not only large businesses; however, in some cases decimating small businesses. The one thing to remember regardless the size of the organization these are our neighbors, friends, family members, and other loved ones that are being impacted. Businesses are having to recalibrate from a growth mindset to a survival mindset.
I read a quote and I may not quote it right nor can find the source; however, someone stated that you can tell the bosses that have never had to live paycheck to paycheck before by the way they treat their staff during this time. This may be a true statement; however, if you do a quick Google search you find that roughly 60-80% of Americans live paycheck to paycheck (this would include said boss). Just because our managers, supervisors, executives, and some C-Suite make way more than the entry level does, it does not mean everything is financially sound with them nor they do not feel empathy towards their employees.
Dave Ramsey and many other financial experts tell us to have a rainy day fund of at least six months of bills to weather a loss of job or decrease in income. I personally was on my way of getting this taken care of this year; however, COVID-19 changed that for me. Though I am not where I want to be I now have a fire to get there. I would suggest for individuals/families, businesses, and governments to begin a plan to create an emergency fund to be in a better situation in the future for whatever may come our way. As an Eagle Scout, one of the sayings is Be Prepared. Right now we need to start being prepared for the future, while living for today.
Organizations are having a tough time as they are wanting to open back up; however, is the opening going to be safe. Employees are stuck between losing a job and unemployment benefits if they don’t feel safe going back to work. It is a fine line that everyone is walking and there is so much uncertainty as what COVID-19 will do. Will there be a second wave? Will the second wave be more deadly than the first? We can put all the data in computers and forecast outcomes; however, those outcomes may not be real life actualities. It is becoming more of until we are in the midst of the crisis will we know the true facts of the situation.
So this long intro is bringing me to a couple of ideas to bring hope and sustainability during this time and the opening of business and economies here in the US and around the world.
Personal
Take the time to evaluate if you are where you want to be. If you are not come up with a plan to correct course.
Begin to set up your emergency fund and begin to payoff debt that is anchoring you from freedom.
Discover your passions and align your life to support those passions.
Connect connect connect!
Get out of the house and talk a walk. Pick up the phone and call.
Dig deeper into your faith.
Work on becoming a whole person. Mind, Soul, Spirit, Emotion, Body!
Business
Begin the process of creating an emergency fund.
Train your managers to not be bosses; however, to be leaders (this is a trainable trait).
Decimate silo’s all the way to the top of the organization. Silo’s create alienation and limit creativity. You never know, someone in your organization may just have the right idea that will catapult the business for the next 100 years no matter what department they are in or what title they hold.
Communicate communicate communicate. I can not stress this enough. Email’s, phone calls, workplace messages, or however, your organization chooses. A true leader trust and cares about their teams and will make the human connection to check in during this time and in the future. You can not lead if you do not know your team!
Realign business models. Look at what is being a waste of resources and realign with those that need more funding as they are being more profitable. Take the emotion out and look at the data. Is a program not coming to fruition? Dig deep and figure out if the program/project is going to be a viable source of income or is it time to pull the plug and move those resources to other areas.
Remember you are in the business of humans. It takes humans to do the work of the organization and humans to purchase the product of your organization.
Evaluate your culture. Is it toxic? Is it positive? Ask questions to those within and truly find out. It is one thing if the upper levels of the organization thinks the culture is great and it is not translating to the lower levels of the organization. Again remove the silos and blinders and you might find out some great things or things that need to be tweaked.
Be open, honest, and transparent.
Finally, truly listen and try to gain understanding.
These are some ideas and they all can be flushed out to more in-depth conversations. Remember we are all in this together. We will all come out of this and be better. Be humble. Be kind. Be supportive. Be compassionate. Be human!
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
Now is the time to soar!
Joel
PODCAST IS COMING SOON!
The Great Reset - Part One
We are in the midst of something most of us have never seen before in our lives. In fact, you would have to go back to World War II and the Great Depression era to get somewhat of an idea of what is going on. Governments worldwide are grappling with how to combat COVID-19 and keep their citizens safe, as well as, making sure the economy is still working. Mass panic set and an eerie sense was in the air. Toilet paper shortages, mask shortages, PPE shortages, ventilator shortages, cleaning supply shortages, and the list can go on and on. Many are working from home; whereas, others are sitting at home wondering when they will get back to work and if their employer is going to reopen once the mandates have been lifted. There is uncertainty and isolation both having its toll on people’s mental health. All this to say we do have hope and we do have a path out. The world we live in will definitely look different than it did before the COVID-19 pandemic; however, we are humans, we adapt, and in fact things may be better when this is all said and done.
Here are somethings that I have noticed during this time. First, many people are stuck at home working as they have to work remote right now; or they are furloughed due to their jobs not being essential; and others that have been completely let go. The COVID-19 pandemic is not only affecting the immune systems of millions of people worldwide, it is also affecting the livelihoods of millions upon millions of people worldwide. Many small, medium, and large businesses are completely shuttered and hoping to weather this storm as well. The recovery may or may not be swift; however, the world has always come back from economic downturns and pandemics and this situation will not be any different.
Many people are being isolated with family, roommates, or by themselves. All are processing these current states of events differently and are being affected by it somehow. Some are processing the loss of income and job security; others are dealing with the actual illness and the fear of what will happen next. The emotional state of this pandemic may be more deadly than the actual illness itself. Many are dealing with their personal demons and figuring out how to become healthy. Others are in survival mode trying to figure out how they are going to make ends meet and how to keep themselves safe; as well as, those they care about being safe. Some are battling anxiety, depression, fear, stress, and so many other emotions that getting out of bed and moving to the living room is a chore upon itself. Then there are others that are planning their next moves and how they are going to use this time to start and finish projects that they never had the time to do. Some are coming up with new business opportunities and services that will not only benefit them; however, will benefit others. Then there are those that are essential businesses and they go out to work every day whether it as a medical professional, military, first responders, apartment complex workers, grocery store workers, truckers, producers, delivery drivers, and so many other professions out there. Some of them are seeing how bad this illness is and the ripple effect it has on the patient, themselves, the patient’s family, and other loved ones. The effect of them going home and quarantining themselves away from their loved ones so they won’t get infected as they don’t want to have what they brought home on themselves into their loved one’s world.
You see, we are all dealing with this in some form or fashion. We are all in this fight together. No matter how you are dealing with this new norm for the moment it is okay. You have to do what is best for you. I have seen posts and sayings out there that if you are not doing XYZ then it just means you are not disciplined, motivated, or dedicated. Well I am sorry; however, that is just not true. Every person is different, and every person is dealing with this in different ways. Yes, logic will say to utilize this time to be productive and creative; however, as I mentioned above it does not always look like that. In prior posts, I have said that there is no magical three steps and you are successful. If today, you got up, took a shower, and talked to a friend or family member and that looks like success for you today then fantastic. I am proud of you. You got this! One step at a time. Marathon runners train for months and years to do their marathons. It takes dedication, determination, and routine.
Wherever you are in your process during this quarantine you are doing great and you will come out of this better than when you stepped into it. One thing about leadership and life is we are all human and that we all process differently and get through things differently. These blanket statements meant to encourage can also have the opposite effect and does not take into consideration what an individual is going through. Instead of blanket statements let’s have empathy, emotional intelligence, and realize that not everyone is going to have a great business idea and you know what that is okay. Not everyone is going to setup a blog, a side hustle, or whatever you think they should be doing because that is not their story but your story. Let us quit comparing what others are doing and judging them for what they may or may not be doing; because frankly some are just surviving. Encourage them in a way that is unique to them and that will go a lot further than saying you aren’t a success because XYZ.
As an individual waiting to know when things will go back to a more routine do whatever it is that makes you feel safe. If during this time you are making life decisions about what you want your life to look like when this is over. Start making those plans now, no matter how difficult. If you are wanting to be a healthier mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically. Do the work and you will make huge moves in the future; however, make those first steps. If you were wondering who your people are and those that were there before this time have not been around talking to you and only talking to you when you check-in, it may be time to reevaluate who you keep in your life and who goes away. There is a season for every relationship and sometimes those seasons are short, and others are long. Do what make you healthy and happy and keep those around that encourage you along the way. Those are the keepers.
If during this time, you are in a fog due to your job and source of income is completely taken away. I definitely understand. Take the time to grieve and let the fog clear. This type of grief takes time and is different for everyone to process, so do what you can and reach out to others you trust or non-profits that are set up to help through this time. Lean in and figure out what you want and where you want to go next. However, do not feel that you need to rush through this process as it is not simple to deal with this and there is no quick fix, you have to go through the process. By going through this process you will be stronger, more understanding, and you very well may find your purpose during this time.
All in all, no one is identical and everyone’s process is different; however, no matter where you are in your personal process keep going you will make it. If you to need block the negatives out via social media, and news, block it out. Just be you and you will get through this. In fact, we all will get through this. Oh yeah, remember to wash your hands, don’t touch your face, and keep six feet apart. Do your part to stop the spread!
This post is dedicated to the millions of medical professionals, first responders, grocery store workers, supply chain personnel, scientists, and others working so we all can be safe, fed, and healthy. You are the true hero’s in the world. I personally am praying for you during this time. May God Bless you, protect you, and use you to heal!
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
Joel Mark
The Storm
As I sit here, the world is in a pandemic. A storm has come in the name of COVID-19. This storm, at least here in Nashville was preceded by a devastating tornado that caused major damage and loss of life. Two weeks later the US and the world are being griped by COVID-19. Whole countries are on lockdown, states are going on lockdown, cities are going on lockdown, mass layoffs are happening in the hospitality industry as businesses are shutting down to help flatten the curve. Social distancing, shelter-in-place, quarantine, epidemic, pandemic, shortages, essential movement, and so many other words have become top in daily conversations.
We are living in a time that many things are being exposed from businesses that truly used their Corporate Social Responsibility as a smoke screen, our selfishness, our depravity, our loneliness, our facades. All have come crumbling down. What is coming back is a realignment of who we are as individuals, nations, businesses, leaders, friends, spouses, family members, parents, grandparents, and children. We are working to protect the most vulnerable. Human decency is coming back. The facade that organizations that we thought were there to protect are incapable of protecting due to red tape. Now don’t get me wrong I believe during this time a more leaner government may come about that can react faster and more decisive during a time like this. Organizations will redevelop CSR principles to make sure that their number one assets are protected (their people).
This storm called COVID-19 will have major impact on everyday life for the foreseeable future. On top of this other natural disasters are happening; earthquakes, locusts, natural disasters, and so much more. During this time many that are sheltering-in-place are thinking of ways to improve life, create new content, chefs creating new foods, bartenders/mixologist creating new libations, distillers creating new alcohols, brewers creating new booze, new ways to create a more sustainable energy supply, playwrights creating new live theater experiences, musicians creating new music, authors creating new stories, and the list can go on and on and on. We are seeing a reset and I will cover that in another post this coming week.
Right now we are in a storm and the other day, once the fog of all that has transpired in March for me personally, an image came to mind and story. As you know I am a man of faith and a follower of the Way. I believe right now we are in a storm and we are panicking and afraid, yet I see the world on a boat in the midst of a major storm and we are afraid of what is going on. In the back of the boat peacefully asleep is a man unfazed by all that is going on. He is awoken by the noise of not the storm but those cry out in fear and pain. He stands up and goes to the front of the boat; passing all those that are busy doing work to calm their fears in great dismay. Each person, country, nation, language, ethnic group He passes a peace comes over them. As He approaches the front of the boat He turns to all the nations and says “I am Greater than this storm. I am Greater than your fears, I am Greater than any nation, leader, and I am working with the healers for I am the Great Healer, the Great Physician. I am the Lord of lords, King of kings, and the Prince of Peace. I am Adonai, I am YHWH.” He turns to the storm and rebukes the storm and a great calm comes across the ocean and a peace permeates over the world.
If this vision I had reminds you of anything then you would be right. It is similar to the story in Scriptures of Jesus and the disciples. If you want to look it up here is the story is found in Matthew 8:23-27; Mark 4:35-41; and Luke 8:22-25.
I know many that will read this post do not have faith in God or anything else; however, I do and I am just sharing what I have felt in the past few weeks. So those that don’t believe I ask you two things, one allow people that do have faith to have their faith; and two in what you do believe good vibes or what not send them out. This is an all out effort by all humanity.
There is hope during this storm. There is peace during this storm. “Fear not for I am with you always” Isaiah 41:10. “Even though I walk through the valley of shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.” Psalm 23.4.
As I mentioned there is hope. There are millions around the world working to control this pandemic. They are scientist, doctors, nurses, pharmaceutical companies, other medical staff. I have seen videos from Switzerland that at nine pm they all open their windows and begin to applaud and cheer on these exhausted healthcare workers. I have seen videos of those in Italy singing to help lift the spirits. Here in the US musicians are doing live shows from their living rooms and broadcasting across the globe. There is hope. We will survive.
During this time remember, those that are on the frontlines of this pandemic. Pray for them daily. Send good vibes their way. Be gracious to others. Love others. If you see one on your necessary run’s to the stores tell them from six feet away thank you. If you have the means pay for what they are buying. Help the first responders get food as their transportation cannot make it through the drive-thru. Prepare masks for the medical staffs. Help those impacted due to the shutdowns monetarily, with food, necessities or whatever you can. Reach out to people you care about. Care for each other from a distance. Love each other. We will get through this. We will overcome. We will come out stronger. We will love harder. We will be more balanced. We will be okay.
THANK YOU TO ALL THAT ARE FIGHTING THIS PANDEMIC AND THOSE THAT WORKING FOR A VACCINE! THANK YOU TO THE DOCTORS AND NURSES, CNA’S, MA’s, HOSPICE, NURSING HOME, FIRST RESPONDERS! YOU GOT THIS AND WE GOT YOU!
BE BOLD! BE COURAGEOUS! BE FEARLESS!
Joel
PS: As my source of income has been affected during the tornado and COVID-19 and you would like to help to make sure this blog stays up and help with the launch of a podcast and vlogging. Please email me at joel@pathofone.com and I will give you ways to help. I am not a 501(c) or a for profit organization. I am an individual just trying to bring hope and share what I have learned. Thank you.
Path of Perseverance
One of my favorite historical figures is Winston Churchill. Prime Minister Churchill was not a very popular member of parliament; however, he found his way into become the Prime Minister of England during a very tumultuous time as Germany was looking to invade England and make it a conquered land. Members of Parliament wanted to talk peace with Adolf Hitler; however, Churchill stood his ground and during those dark days fought to make sure that England would remain free from the grip of Nazi Germany and the Reich.
Churchill became Prime Minister 10 May 1940 a short eight months after the start of World War II. Shortly after the King of England made him Prime Minister, parliament wanted to cast a vote of no confidence as he would not tow the party line, nor bow to Hitler. However, with his bullish attitude and passion for the people of England and England in general, Churchill would not back down from protecting his country and not making peace with Hitler. This by far is one of the greatest aspects of World War II and contained the threat of the Reich from reaching further across the globe. If you have not watched it already, go watch Darkest Hour and it details the tumultuous time that Churchill came to power and how he stood up to his own party to stop Hitler.
On 29 October 1941, a short year after becoming Prime Minister, Churchill went to his alma mater Harrow School. Now this is one of the most misquoted speeches of our time as most believe that Churchill just stood up repeated the phrase Never give up, never, never, never; however, this is not the case. Towards the end of the speech which is magnificent, Churchill says these words:
“Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never-in nothing, great or small, large or petty - never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy. “ (Churchill, 1941)
The next lines after this infamous portion of the speech are just profound as Churchill speaks on how other countries thought England would not survive the threat of Nazi Germany and Adolf Hitler.
We stood all alone a year ago, and to many countries it seemed that our account was closed, we were finished. All this tradition of ours, our songs, our School history, this part of the history of this country, were gone and finished and liquidated.
Very different is the mood today. Britain, other nations thought, had drawn a sponge across her slate. But instead our country stood in the gap. There was no flinching and no thought of giving in; and by what seemed almost a miracle to those outside these Islands, though we ourselves never doubted it, we now find ourselves in a position where I say that we can be sure that we have only to persevere to conquer.” (Churchill, 1941).
Churchill whole life was filled with adversity and he overcame so much from a father who thought Winston would not amount to anything and other mistakes and hurdles; however, despite all of this Churchill in his own words never gave in. There are several great books to read about Churchill here are two of them: Churchill: Walking with Destiny by Andrew Roberts (also made into a movie Churchill: Walking with Destiny) and the three part book series The Last Lion by William Manchester and Paul Reid.
Just like Churchill we all face adversity in life, most likely not on a grand scale as he did; however, we all can learn from his “never surrender” and “never give in” mantra. Life is difficult and leadership is just the same. There are times that the people who “know better” will be giving you bad advice and you just have to go with your gut. There are seasons in life that just are difficult and you are unable able to find a clear path. Persevering is a key to any type of success.
Often times you will have to go at things alone and contrary to popular belief in leadership. This isn’t because you are crazy or don’t know what you are doing; however, it is because you know what is right. The masses, media, career politicians, business professionals, entertainment, and talking heads say that things should be one way and in truth they should be another way. The status quo is not always the best option. Sometimes the best option is to go against the flow and move forward and making a new path. These times get hard and they are often met with resistance, anger, hatred, confusion, challenges, and so many other obstacles. Learn from Churchill and blaze your own trail. If Churchill listened to other countries and his own party the world very well may look extremely different than it does to do. Churchill persevered and forged his path forward even during the darkest of days.
So I ask you! Who is the Churchill of today? Who will go against the grain and create a better tomorrow? Where is the Martin Luther Kings? Who will persevere when all the world is against them? When those want to take you down will you persevere?
Never give in! Never surrender!
Be Bold! Be Fearless! Be Courageous!
Joel
Churchill, W. (1941). Address to Harrow School 29 October 1941. http://www.eng.uwaterloo.ca/~jcslee/poetry/churchill_nevergivein.html
Photo Credit: Yousuf Karish
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O Holy Night
Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!
This post has taken me a while to write, in fact, over a month. Not because of writers block; however, due to fear of what others may think and it is not traditional to life and leadership. I say this; however, faith is an integral part of all of our lives no matter if you are a Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, atheist, agnostic, and the list goes on. I will write more on faith in a different post and how it is integral in who we are as individuals and the impact it has in our lives and in our leading. The fear came in and the hustle and bustle of the position I work until I am able to support myself off of this idea of Path of One. Then I remembered my tag line Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless! Regardless of what you believe or think about what this post is about and this season, my prayer is that your heart and mind will be open and that you will find some hope, peace, joy, and love.
For those that don’t know me personally, I am a follower of the Way. You might ask yourself, what or who is a follower of the Way. A follower of the Way in modern terms is a Christian. If you like to know more about why I say this feel free to message me and I would be happy to discuss. So here we go!
Christmas has always been a favorite time of year for me. Growing up in Texas, we didn’t get much snow or cold weather, in fact, often times we could wear shorts and t-shirts. I would watch A Christmas Carol adaptions multiple times and would sing O, Holy Night whenever I could. In fact, I probably have a least 100 different renditions of O, Holy Night on my iTunes account and constantly look to find more versions every year. There is something so serene, powerful, peaceful, and hopeful that comes through these lyrics. For those that don’t know the song, I am adding the first verse so you can at least know what I am speaking of.
O Holy night! The stars are brightly shining
It is the night of our dear Savior's birth
Long lay the world in sin and error pining
'Til He appears and the soul felt its worth
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn
Fall on your knees; O hear the Angel voices!
O night divine, O night when Christ was born
O night, O Holy night, O night divine!
To me Christmas is more than just about giving and receiving gifts. It is about the gift of the Creator taking human form and being born into our world. You can read the Christmas narrative from the New Testament in Luke 1-2 and Matthew 1-2. I will attest that the day we celebrate Christmas now, Dec. 25th, is not the actual date of his birth; however, the date was decided and we celebrate and remember this gift.
Some may say, well, I won’t believe a word you say because you believe in Jesus Christ, God the Father, and God the Holy Spirit. To those that say this that is perfectly okay with me; however, I can chose to believe and have faith and I respect your belief to disagree with me. Yet I digress.
Christmas is about hope and peace. It is about joy and love. It is about sacrifice. It is about so much more than what we know of it today. I was having some conversations with fellow associates the other day about how it really hasn’t felt like Christmas or the holiday’s this year. As I drove home that night I pondered why. So much has been thrown around in the media, social media, and life in general that the miracle of Christmas is getting drowned out.
We get so busy from Thanksgiving to New Years Eve finishing the work year off strong. Finishing up projects, meeting deadlines, goal casting for next year, shopping for all those that you need to shop for, holiday parties, end of a semester, finals, and so much more. We get so busy we forget that this time is to celebrate and enjoy life. Be merry. We are so worried and wrapped up with ourselves, our dreams, our goals, what will happen in the future that we miss the biggest aspects of our lives. That is being present in the lives of those we love as we are not promised a tomorrow.
In our society today, we are so scattered brained, exhausted, depleted mind, soul, and body, that we just go through the motions of life. We have no hope, no joy, no love, no nothing. We are empty and depleted and have nothing to give and just hoping that we can make it until the end of the year. This time of year should not be about ]getting a huge to-do list done, getting busy doing whatever it is you have to get done. But to enjoy the gift of friendship, love, and family. There is hope, there is peace, and there is joy in this season. We all just have to pause and remember that. As for me I pause and remember what Christmas Eve and Day is about. I remember the hope, peace, joy, and love that it brings. If you don’t align with me that is your choice and I respect your choice. Just know that despite our differences in beliefs here, just remember that it’s not about gifts it is about time to celebrate with others.
May His peace be with you. May His light shine upon you and in you. May His love radiate around you and through you. May His joy fill you.
I wish you a Merry Christmas! To our Jewish friends Happy Hanukkah! To everyone else Happy Holidays!
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
Joel
Path of Thankfulness
It is a cold December morning. He woke up and was wondering how he was going to make ends meet. The world hadn’t been fair to him and he just needed someone to give him a chance to prove his worth. He was thankful for the job that he had even with the ups and downs of it. He was thankful for the food in his refrigerator and a place to lay his head. However, he was still in a position of there has to be more to life than just waking, working, eating, and sleeping. That cold December morning he chose to take the path of thankfulness and focus on what was good and instead of the negative.
Are any of you familiar with a situation like this? You have a job that you don’t particularly care for and it is leading to no improvement in your life. You show up and do your job and excel but there is no path to move forward and upward? The story above is fictional; however, it rings true to millions of people around the world. You sit there eating and sharing with others and see their successes and wonder why has my ticket not been punched yet? You think about how am I going to feed myself when this food runs out? Hot am I going to pay rent/mortgage, car note, things for the kids, new clothes, put gas in the car, etc? These are rough times when you are in situations like this. It seems as the walls are crashing in and you need a lifeline and then something else happens.
I get it! I have been there way too often and it is a struggle some days just to get out of bed to conquer the day. You click on your FaceBook, Instagram, Snapchat, LinkedIN, and other social media platforms and it looks like everyone else is succeeding and having a great life. You get emails and see seminars and motivational speakers saying these three things will get you rich! These three things will help you succeed. These three….. You get my point. Yet you do those three things and there are no changes. In fact, these people fail to mention life is a marathon and yes those three things may benefit you; however, the road is long, twisty, bumpy, and down right dangerous at times, and then sometimes it is smooth road for miles at a time.
Success is different for everyone and it is not always denoted by financial gain. In fact, I would side with Timothy in 1 Timothy 6.10 that love of money (materialistic things) is the root of all evil. Yes, this is a Christian perspective and many will roll their eyes; however, take a moment and think about it as wisdom. We pursue careers that pay us more and when we get those positions we want more money and more stuff. We do whatever it takes to get to the next level and lose what it is to be thankful and appreciative. Yes there are things that we have to make our lives easier; however, if those things make us lose who we are as individuals it is not worth it. The cost is too steep and the damage that it causes often times is irreversible. We lose sight of those we care about, do things we would not have normally have done, bend the rules just to get a bigger financial gain, and so forth and so on.
You might be thinking why is pertinent to the path of thankfulness. Being thankful for what you have and changing your mindset will crush the love of money. I have seen where those that were thankful for a little ended up leading great organizations and were given more. :These same people may be driving nicer cars now; however, they are grateful for what they have and do not take it for granted as they know all of it can come crashing down tomorrow. These people never changed how they treat people in public or behind closed doors. You see the lives we see on the socials are just a snippet of what someone is going through, it’s like the highlight reel of life and most of the time it is the great times that are shared and not the dark times.
For example, this past week here in the United States we celebrated Thanksgiving. Despite all the reasons behind Thanksgiving why some are upset. Drop that away and think about what Thanksgiving is about. To be thankful for what you have been blessed with, be thankful for your life, family, friends, pets, and whatever else you are thankful for. This all changes a few hours after the turkey, ham, rolls, cranberry sauce, mac and cheese, potatoes, etc., has been changed. The onslaught of Black Friday. We have all see the videos of people lashing out and storming stores to get these great deals; however, just a few hours earlier we were all thankful. Now don’t get me wrong, I know a lot of people that have to utilize these Black Friday deals to be able to have a Christmas for their kids and they are truly grateful for these sales. However, the ones that get out of line and cause mayhem, well, who knows.
This year as I sat at a bar eating lunch before I headed into work. I heard many people complaining about things that really don’t matter, being rude to the service staff (as I am sure they were rude to any staff that had to work instead of being with family), and just not being thankful whatsoever. No matter what the staff did to accommodate them it wasn’t good enough. I even heard stories of people throwing their food at people because the order came out incorrect. Take a moment to think about that. Having a tantrum the day after being thankful.
You see we have all become very ungrateful on what we have due to marketing and other things fighting for our attention. Always have to latest and greatest. Not understanding that mistakes may be made. I am not saying that having stuff and other nice things are not great, or a great salary. What I am saying is we need to be like the character at the beginning of this post. We need to be thankful for what we have and during this season be courteous to anyone that is taking care of you whether it is a restaurant, retail store, gas station, wherever you are at and someone is taking care of you. Be kind, be appreciative, as you never know what someone else may have just said and done to them before they cross your path.
So do something appreciative to them. Kind words or whatever comes to mind. Be a light to them. Be thankful for what you have. Take care of those that are less fortunate (please don’t post about it as, well, it’s about them and not you).
This is a season of peace, joy, love, thankfulness, hope, promise, excitement, wonder, and so much more. If we focus on the good and kick the negative we can make our own ripples.
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
Joel
Path of Hope
This particular blog has taken me a while to write. There seemed to be something always blocking me from writing it, as well as, not really knowing how to write this particular blog. For starters I am not a trained psychological professional. Yes I have had classes in the past and I encourage anyone that reads this blog and is struggling with what I am about to discuss is to reach out to a trained professional. Always remember there is hope!
Robin Williams stated “I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it’s like to feel absolutely worthless and they don’t want anyone else to feel like that.” Tragically, we lost Robin to this what I call the silent killer depression. A well respected pastor committed suicide over depression as well. The list can go on and on. WE ALL HAVE BEEN IMPACTED BY DEPRESSION.
Hope for Depression (Hope for Depression, 2019) stated that depression is the most prevalent mental-illness, or as they prefer to say mind-brain illness, in the United States at a staggering 99% of all diagnosed. This includes PTSD, postpartum depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety, and suicide (Hope for Depression, 2019). Depression is such an epidemic that the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the World Health Organization (WHO), and many other international bodies closely watch and try to find solutions for the growing problem.
The CDC stated that the 50% of all Americans will have been diagnosed with a mental health issue at some point in their lives (CDC, 2018). The CDC further found that depression is the third most common cause of hospitalization in the United States and that those that suffer from severe mental health issues shortens their life span by 25 years (CDC, 2018). Staggering if you ask me. However, I am not done with the data just yet.
Hope for Depression compiled data from several sources for the this next round of data I am going to share. HFD quoted R.C. Kesslers data from 2005 that over 18 million adults in the United States or one in ten face depression at anytime in a given year (HFD, 2019). Depression is the leading cause of disability for ages 15-44, and is the primary reason someone dies from suicide roughly every 12 minutes (HFD, 2019)! According to the CDC that equates to 41,000 lives lost due to depression just in the United States which is more than homicides in 2013 with an estimated 13,000 lives lost due to homicide (HFD, 2019).
Worldwide the epidemic affects over 300 million people according to the WHO (HFD, 2019). WHO stated that depression is one of the most debilitating condition in the world and is in the same category of terminal cancer (as stated in HFD, 2019). Furthermore, the WHO stated that epidemic of depression “is the leading cause of disability worldwide, and is a major contributor to the overall global burden of disease” (HFD, 2019). Depression knows now prejudice, it affects all genders, ages, nationalities, sexualities, and income levels around that globe.
Sobering statistics if you ask me. Statistics stated by Merikangas and Greenberg in HFD (2019) the economic impact on businesses in the United States is estimated to be over $100 billion (USD) a year. Depression accounts for 490 million disability days a year and a lost of $23 billion (USD) in lost workdays a year (HFD, 2019).
Okay, now that I think I have got your attention. You maybe sitting here wondering how does all this relate to Path of Hope as the title suggests of this topic. How does this impact leadership capabilities? And I am sure there is a plethora of other questions you all may have. Well first and foremost, as the human species we must fight against the ridiculous taboo of discussing mental health. We have all seen the outcomes of what can happen play out on the news and breaking news cycles. We are not comfortable to speak about it even though as the WHO stated depression is listed in the same category as terminal cancer. Suicide according to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH, 2019) is one of the leading causes of death in the United States (NIMH, 2019). NIMH (2019) stated according to the CDC 47,000 lives were lost due to suicide in 2017. BeFrienders Worldwide a volunteer action to prevent suicide stated that the data that is given may be higher than what is reported due to the stigma of suicide and mental health issues (2018). BeFrienders stated WHO statistics that 16 people per 100,000 will commit suicide a year which equates to 1 every 40 seconds; however, by 2020 it is predicted that this rate will increase to 1 every 20 seconds (BeFrienders, 2018). Suicide is the 11th cause of death in the United States and the rate is increasing amongst adolescents and the elderly (BeFrienders, 2018).
All this to say we need to drop the taboo of talking about mental health. It impacts every aspect of life and knows no boundary. Though rates drop in those in higher incomes and a difference between men and women, it still needs to be discussed. So much can trigger depression. A traumatic episode, financial concerns, giving birth, abuse, sexual assault, lost of a loved one, loss of hope, loneliness, despair, anxiety, medical issues, our age taking a toll on our bodies, loss of job, and the list goes on. We are compassionate people and if we can come together as one voice and help prevent people from taking their lives then it is a good day. There is much work that does need to be done; however, as I stated in prior posts we most create a ripple effect. Many of us do not have a megaphone that can cause major ripples; however, we do have an impact on those in our direct circle. Be open with others. If you sense that something is wrong ask. Don’t pressure but ask. Encourage those that are suffering. Be there is they need to talk. Let them know you love them. Bring back hope of decent human beings. Love yourself and love people. I personally go by the stance Love God, Love People and I do my best to live that throughout my life.
We have all had days that we have felt like hope was lost. That the darkness of life comes crashing in and you don’t know what to do or what tomorrow will look like, heck you may not even know what today will look like. But remember, you have had a day like this before and the morning still came, you are still breathing, you have conquered issues in the past and you can and will do it again. The key is taking the right steps forward. One step at a time. No one has conquered anything in one day. Be patient with yourself. Learn to love yourself in a healthy way. Seek help from the many trained professionals out there. Reach out to the nonprofits that are there to help free of charge.
To those right now that are struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts. First and foremost, reach out to someone you trust. Pick up the phone and call them or text them. Just let them know you need help. To the person on the other side. This is not a time to give opinions or solutions let them talk and let them know you are there and that you care. If they ask come over if at all possible. If they ask go with them to a session and wait patiently as they begin their road to healing. We are all on a path. It may seem that the Path of One is an individual journey; however, the beauty in the English language, one is not a lonely number is can mean so many different things and a unit, or team, are part of being a Path of One.
As I wrap this post up. I want to encourage each one of you that read this. You are precious. You have a purpose. There is a hope for a brighter tomorrow even if it does not look like there is today. Life is difficult and none of us got a road map and we make the best of it everyday. Be true to yourself and don’t listen to the nay sayers. Those people need to be cut out of our lives. I pray that each person that reads this post and all my posts will feel love, acceptance, hope, peace, joy, and happiness. I believe that our today and tomorrow will be greater than what we are seeing today. You all are here to make an impact! Never forget that! And if no one has told you today you are beautiful, you are handsome, you are smart, you are wise, you are passionate, you are amazing!
One last quote from Robin Williams, “If you’re that depressed, reach out to someone. And remember, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.”
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
Joel
If you are contemplating suicide please reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
Also if you have healthcare coverage a majority of providers and organizations have mental health as part of your benefits. Reach out to your provider and they can connect you to a licensed professional. Speak with your benefits coordinator at your job to see if it is covered.
BeFrienders Worldwide (2018). Suicide Statistics. www.befrienders.org
Centers for Disease and Prevention Control (2018). Mental Health. www.cdc.gov/mentalhealth/data_publications
Hope for Depression (2019). Depression Facts. www.hopefordepression.org/depression-facts
National Institute of Mental Health (2019). Suicide. www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/suicide.shtml
Path to Leadership
I have been sitting here all day trying to write and still have no real direction. The one thought that keeps coming to mind is how our lives impact leadership. Leadership in the sense of leading others. My prior posts have been about life in general and how to make strides in your personal life. The question becomes how does that relate to leadership? That is a great question.
To answer there are many facets of leadership and the most important aspect in leading is leading one’s personal life. Take for instance a home remodeler. They do fantastic work on their projects and some of their work can lasts decades; however, if you go to their home it needs a lot of work. These men and women put all of themselves into their craft on others; however, have no energy to do it for themselves. Now, take that thought and think about leaders in other organizations. They lead and some do a fantastic job; however, if you look at their personal life it is in shambles. They lead and make major decisions everyday and yet some of the simplest decisions outside of work can seem huge due to all their energy and focus has been at work.
I am a proponent that though these individuals seem like they are winning on the outside they are actually losing in life. There are the mantras of work-life balance and yet here in the United States we seem to work more to achieve success and yet we have high divorce rates, suicides, anger, hatred, depression, anxiety, and so much more. The reason I have focused on life before diving into the theories on leadership and other things that can impact an organization is that we need to be healthy outside of any leadership role.
Now think about this. If a leader, regardless of title, is healthy and able to fire on all cylinders and are healthy personally what kind of impact will they have on their families, friends, community, and organizations? The ripple effect can be felt for generations to come. I can imagine the impact that we can have on the world and eternal impacts these decisions will make. Emotional Intelligence, a healthy and secure life, and so much more impact leadership more than just how you lead your teams.
I am a man that believes in faith and the spiritual side of life. Outside of taking time to enjoy family, friends, hobbies, vacationing, and keeping your body healthy, there is so much more. You must take time to recharge your soul. I know many people do not hold my beliefs; however, there is something about taking time to rejuvenate this part of your life. Some will say this is your emotional aspects of life and that is part of it. But have you ever though my job is soul crushing or I just feel off and don’t know why. Some of this can be resolved by taking time to just be. Take a sabbatical and head to the ocean or mountains. Do something that fills you up. Whatever that means or whatever your faith is do that. I am just saying take care of your whole person so when the time comes you will be ready to lead.
To those that are leaders currently. I encourage you to pursue your balance. Make sure you are unplugging from work. Turn off the phone, shutdown the computer, and spend time with those that matter most. Jobs and positions come and go. Money is fleeting. What is not is your health, family, children and spouse if you have them, friends, moments, memories. In the end, you may be remembered for what you give society; however, what matters most is those that you leave behind and the impact negative or positive you have had on them. We all make mistakes; and as current leader realize that you are not infallible and you are not superhuman. Do your family, team, and most importantly yourself be healthy body, mind and soul.
We are all leaders as we have to lead our own lives daily. Let us take care of ourselves first and taking care and leading others will be the natural outflow of this healthy life. Please feel free to comment and share on this post or any others that you have used. I love to hear feed back and thoughts.
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
Joel
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
This post is about being bold, being courageous, and being fearless. These are my tag lines at the end of each post and is a reminder to myself to Be Bold! Be Courageous! and Be Fearless! As I was developing the idea for this blog/consultation I was thinking to myself what can I do that will impact others lives. This doubt kept coming back to me saying you have nothing to say. You don’t have any experience and your education doesn’t matter. No one will listen to you, you are just a bartender. The lies and doubts came and still do at a rapid pace.
One night as I was struggling if this was the right way for me to share what I have learned and help others. The doubts began to come at me full force. Then a small still voice inside said Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless! Little did I know that those three statements would impact me so much. The small voice returned and pointed me to look at my forearm where I have the words Carpe Diem permanently marked on my arm. The voice said Carpe Diem (Seize the Day in Latin) and Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless! After that night I sat down and begin to search for a name for the blog and reach out to those who maybe able to assist me in creating this dream become reality.
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
Often times in life we become timid and do not want to speak up for what is right, how we want to be treated, voice our opinions, and so much more. These three statements hold true in reminding us to step forward and do whats right.
Often times people believe that to be heard you have to resort to violence, hateful rhetoric, instilling fear in others, talking down to others, abusing others (verbally, mentally, emotionally, and physically); however, the contrary is true. Being bold, courageous, and fearless does not mean to do any of those things. In fact, it means you need to get out of your head and turn off the negativity. Say what you mean with conviction, compassion, and passion. It also means be humble and willing to listen.
These three statements don’t always mean that there is a discussion to be had. This could be someone who is struggling with seeking help for whatever issue that is holding them back. This could mean stepping out and putting yourself out there and confronting your fears. For me asking a woman out, writing this blog every week, or my irrational fear of heights. Personally, I have tried to conquer these one by one and realized that all three are tied together and the combination allows you to make huge personal momentum.
For those that are struggling with things. I encourage you to move out of your comfort zone. Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless! Confront those demons and make strides to overcome. Speak with those that have converged on your path and let them know that you are struggling and ask them to be of assistance if they can. Seek professional help and all these fellow sojourners can help you overcome.
If you are working in an environment that there are issues that need to be resolved and not just by a band-aide; create a game plan with how to deliver the information and be prepared to come with solutions. Remember it is not always what is said or the information that is given that causes most of our issues in this world; however, it is in the delivery. Refrain from finger pointing and causing more damage; however, use words and ideas that will create buy-in, positive outcomes, and ultimately lead to solutions to issues that need to be addressed.
Always remember that your tongue is a double edged sword that can bring harm or it can bring healing. You have the choice on which to use. We have all seen the harms of poor choice of verbiage, inflection, and tone can do in situations. Be countercultural and use your words for healing, hope, and positive change. Start small and grow from there as some of the issues that plague us takes time to change and just like ripples in the water go from the center out. Impact what you can and let the ripple effect impact those around you and then let it multiply.
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!
Joel
Path of the Warrior
In today’s society we are told to be quiet, listen, and don’t make waves. In some situations this is a perfectly find attribute. In fact, we have lost the art of true communication where we actually listen to understand and come to comprise, respect, and trust each other even with differing view points. This particular post is not about the communication aspect that we as a culture need to develop; however, it is about the warrior within each one of us that has been pushed down and hidden.
Warriors lived by a code of that set them apart from others in society. They defended their homelands, fought for those who could night fight for themselves, brought justice when justice was needed, banded together and fought and protected as one. These men and women are still around today in different forms and fashions. They may not have swords, weapons, armor, and other tools of war; however, they wield their weapons through pen and paper, blogs, politics, community service, volunteering, denying their need to be right but to make this world a better place. Just like those of the days gone by they live by a code of integrity, honor, humility, discipline, compassion, unity, and honesty.
These warriors are scientist searching for the cure of some many diseases that affect children, adults, and the elderly. They provide shelter for those who need to be protected from abusive relationships. They provide protection when they are not respected. They get up regardless of what others say and think and do to them; they get up and set out to do their best for the task that they have been charged with.
These are people that are admired throughout history and we hear their stories as they have been canonized in books of history. Yet, here we are on our own paths and feeling like we are not warriors and that we can not be these men and women of yesterday today. That is not the truth. Many of these warriors have had their own struggles and obstacles; yet they still chose to get up and fight every day and protect every day.
You see, a warriors number one goal in my opinion is to let the inner warrior out and fight for what you believe in. This by no means that you have to be violent; however, you can use the strength of your self to defeat the evils within and outside. There are many people that are warriors and they do not realize that they are. These are people that have been bullied, abused, tossed aside, ridiculed, defeated, and demeaned. Some of these things may not be attributed to you; however, you are still a warrior. You have the power to fight and overcome any situation that you have come across throughout your life.
Have you ever stopped and looked back at your life and said wow I made it through it. That my friend is a warrior. A person who has seen adversity and made it through. As I sit here I am going through a battle and correcting the mistakes I have made. I refuse to let someone dictate who I am and that this mountain can not be climbed and conquered. That is a warrior.
You may be getting bullied at school, work, from family, or friends. You have the chose to stand up for yourself and not retaliate or get made but to share hope and love back to those that bully you. They are trying to dominate you and tell you are worthless. You can take that power away from them by knowing your worth and showing love. In some situations, you just walk away. However; if you retaliate then they have won counter their negative with positives about them. That my friends is a warrior.
Now if the situation is more violent in nature defend yourself and call the proper authorities. If the assault you that is a crime and the punishment for their actions should be held accountable for. To those women and men that are being abused by a spouse, partner, boyfriend, girlfriend, or anyone other category. You have the power to get out and stand up for yourself. Reach out to organizations that are there for you to get out and to be protected. Seek the therapist to conquer the damage.
To those who know something is wrong within their mental and emotional state and you have reached out to a therapist, support group, AA, NA, PTSD support groups, and whatever may be plaguing you from allowing the inner warrior to come out. You are to be encouraged as you are moving in the paths of warriors conquering the evil within and coming out stronger and better than you were yesterday.
Find your voice and your strength. Protect yourself and then you can protect others. Let your warrior come out and the change in your immediate world will change. Yes there are warriors that go at it alone; however, most in history had other warriors fighting alongside them for victory. Find your clan of warriors and fight!
Be Bold! Be Courageous! Be Fearless!